I've been struggling lately with my brain. You see, I was raised with a lot of head knowledge about God and the Bible. I was on the Bible Quiz team and had to memorize a stack of 500 questions and answers related to Bible verses and facts (yes, I had to memorize the questions AND the answers. You could buzz in on the beginning of the question, finish it and then answer it to get points... if you were that good.) I was in church every Sunday and every Wednesday and we listened to tapes of preachers in the car and at home throughout the week and went to their meetings when they came to town. My parents referenced the Bible often and I remember my Mom and Dad both, after quoting a verse that applied to a certain situation or topic almost always pulling out a Bible and reading the text and the verses around it, just to make sure they were remembering right and to give it some context.
Because of all this knowledge and my always-contemplating, critically-thinking mind, I love debate. I love it just for the sake of it and I love winning. I'll debate almost anything I know enough about and I'll even question someone about a topic they like even if I don't really have a firm grasp of it. I exchanged over 30 full pages of emails with a college friend of mine over Christmas break one year debating the topic of my faith. I like posers. I like games that make you think. I'm wired to find mistakes in others' writings, sermons, etc. and it gives me a little thrill when I do. (see post; The Muffin Police)
I was raised to have a relationship with God too, not just know things about Him. I asked Jesus to come into my heart when I was two. I rededicated my life to God and remember speaking in tongues for the first time when I was about 7. I was eager to get baptized, but the pastor said I couldn't explain it to him well enough and would have to wait. I was baptized at, like, 8. I participated in youth group. I was a stellar child (this is according to my parents). I witnessed to my friends.
I never rebelled as a teen. I went to a party college, but never partied. I got involved in a local church and was part of their dance ministry as well as a campus ministry. All my friends in college knew where I stood and Who I stood with. I didn't date or kiss anyone throughout college. (There was one guy who tricked me and stole a kiss. Yes, you can actually steal a kiss.) I married the first guy I dated and we're still happily married.
This is all just to give you the backdrop of my life as you read the rest of my thoughts and struggles as of late.
Here are the Biblical references that frame my struggles.
1 Peter 3:15 - Always be ready to give a logical defense to anyone who asks you to account for the hope that is in you
1 Corinthians 13:1-3 - 1 If I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am become sounding brass, or a clanging cymbal.
2 And if I have the gift of prophecy, and know all mysteries and all knowledge; and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.
3 And if I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and if I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profiteth me nothing.
Romans 13 :10-13 - 10 Love does no wrong to others, so love fulfills the requirements of God’s law. 11 This is all the more urgent, for you know how late it is; time is running out. Wake up, for our salvation is nearer now than when we first believed. 12 The night is almost gone; the day of salvation will soon be here. So remove your dark deeds like dirty clothes, and put on the shining armor of right living. 13 Because we belong to the day, we must live decent lives for all to see.
Ephesians 5:16-17 - 16 Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days. 17 Don’t act thoughtlessly, but understand what the Lord wants you to do.
More to come...
Sunday, January 04, 2009
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
Thank you for posting this. I have struggled so much with the "academic" side of christianity for pretty much my whole life. I understand it's just as important, and I know I am weaker without it, but I've always preferred focusing on the love and relationship and have let that be my guide. I was no bookworm, and I'm slowly learning that learning can be fun, but what you've written here, especially having the references to scripture, have been very encouraging to continue to use knowledge as the cement of my building of faith. (is that too cheesy?).
Good stuff Sara! It is hard to really love isn't it? I can tell the kids about Jesus one minute and then I'm snapping at them the next. I have been known to be ruled by my emotions and sadly, love usually isn't at the top of that list.
Post a Comment