Forgiveness

I had a teachable moment last night. It's not often fun to be in the middle of a teachable moment. Those moments are usually uncomfortable or unpleasant. Well, no different here.

I was upset with someone. I felt they had not made the best choices and had, in turn, inconvenienced me. I then stewed.

After a few minutes of stewing, God reminded me I needed to forgive and that I was only hurting myself by continuing to hold on to my disgruntled-ness.

So I set out to convince myself to forgive, regardless of how I felt. "Well," I thought, "he didn't really mean to. He had no ill intentions. In fact, he was probably thinking he was doing me a favor. His heart was probably in the right place." I was becoming pleased with myself. I'm so generous to realize these things and give the benefit of the doubt. This is really helping me work towards forgiveness.

Then God cut into my thoughts. "Wrong. That's not what I want you to do, Sara."

"What? I'm doing a great job here, God!"

"That's not forgiveness, Sara."

"What do you mean that's not forgiveness. Just let me continue to work this out and I'll get there eventually. Give me a few more minutes. It's not instantaneous."

"That's NOT forgiveness."

Oh, crud. I get it now.

Sigh.

Colossians 3: 12-13

¹² Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts,kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, ¹³ bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.

"Did you have anything good at ALL for Me to use as an excuse to forgive you? Did you in ANY way deserver the forgiveness I gave?" said my Father to me.

So often, we try to make ourselves forgive others by trying to realize their good intentions or by finding some grain of "good" in them that makes them possibly worthy of our forgiveness. The danger in that is that there will surely be a time when you can find no exchange for your forgiveness, no good in the one who has wronged you. Then, if you have only practiced forgiveness in this way, you will be stuck with growing bitterness inside your heart for the rest of your life. It will eat your insides out. It will take a part of you away and you will not be a fully functioning individual. You will have given Satan a foothold that he can enjoy and exploit.

Even when we CAN find that excuse to forgive, that's still not real forgiveness, so we shouldn't even bother.

God forgave me when there was nothing I could give Him. I had no redeeming qualities, but He redeemed me for Himself. I am called to forgive others even as He forgave me, not for their benefit, but for mine. God wants me to be free and my heart to be unfettered. He led by example and He also provides the power to follow.

Try it for yourself today.